I want to wife ??? - RV-Dreams Community Forum

Idaho556 · RV-Dreams Family Member

I want to wife ???

Terry and Jo · RV-Dreams Family Member

First and foremost, welcome to the RV Dreams forum as an active member instead of just being a reader. With your vast experience with several RV's, you will be a valuable source of information for others. At the same time, your questions will be welcomed and answered in (generally) a good friendly nature.

Now, for your question about convincing your wife. Here comes the "joker's" version.

First of all start buying flowers and candy WITH NO EXPLANATION FOR THE REASON. Follow that up with doing things you seldom EVER do. Do that for at least SIX WEEKS.

Once she has ran every possible reason for your kindness and thoughtfulness through her head, then you can just say, "I want to share this entire beautiful country with the woman I love."

(Let me know how that works. I may need to try it myself.)

OK. Serious now. First of all, take into consideration any comments she has made that may have been negative about all the camping the two of you have done in the past. For each negative thing, think of an idea that would counter it.

If you have an opportunity, take a longer than normal vacation and see what her reactions would be to being in a smaller place.

If she speaks of missing family, remind her that travel would let the two of you take family to different places or let you travel to family more often. (Develop the ability to think of alternatives that would be a positive experience, rather than a negative.)

But, most serious of all, listen carefully to what she says and try to encourage her to consider expanding her horizons. If she is very negative about it all, just continue to camp on a limited basis and let her experience more.

Another forum participant, Bubbadan by username, had a similar situation. His wife had always made somewhat negative comments about "camping out," even when it was in a travel trailer. Enough so that Dan sold his camper. Then, as they were preparing to spend some time in south Texas on a church mission event, SHE came up and said that it would be nice to rent a camper so they wouldn't have to stay in questionable hotel rooms.

Now, from what I think Dan told me, I think she does some of the planning for where they will go in their new camper.

Main thing is to listen and just drop little hints. ("Such and such place is sure nice, wouldn't it be nice if we could stay there longer without the expense of paying for hotel rooms?)

Be patient if she seems hesitant, but always consider her feelings and wishes. Divorce courts are far more expensive than campers.

Oh, by the way.......it was my wife who suggested that we sell the house and everything in it to begin this adventure. Once we can retire in a few years, we will be traveling a lot. Mostly staying in some places for 3 to 6 months while we explore all we choose to in each area before moving on.

Terry

Froggi · RV-Dreams Family Member

Already gotten some good advice so just adding my welcome to the forum!

Melstar · RV-Dreams Family Member

My husband was the one who first mentioned selling home and stuff and buying an RV to live in and travel. At first I said "no way are you crazy??" Then, being the reseacher that I am, I started googling fulltiming in an RV..wow.....developed the desire....and now I think I'm more into it than DH.
We did buy a 5th wheel and truck to pull it with and have gone on the "longer than usual vacation" as Terry suggested. DH still wants to stay in the S&B longer so we will continue to use it for extended trips. We have options if we ever decide to really "retire"!! :)

-- Edited by Melstar on Sunday 1st of May 2011 09:58:16 AM

Bill Adams · RV-Dreams Family Member

My wife is not a "camper" per se. Throwing down a tent and curling up in a sleeping bag would only work for her if we were in the backyard of our house with all the necessary amenities nearby. She loves a campfire and roasting marshmallows and all of that but she wants a comfortable, safe place to sleep and cook and shower, etc. We started out by renting a motorhome. She was hooked immediately. We could camp just a little but still have all of the luxury when necessary. You might want to make one of your vacation plans an adventure and plan a trip in a motorhome. Maybe visit a National park or other sightseeing venue. May you/she have a particular hobby or passion that you could tie in with a motorhome trip. Music or art festivals, car shows, hiking/biking, geocaching (look that one up if necessary). Once we knew she liked that we rented a couple more to see what kind of things that we did and did not want in an RV. By the time we were ready to buy everyone was on-board with the plan and we knew what we wanted. Later when we turned full-time we traded up for a larger RV with the additional features we knew we wanted/needed and we have been happy with that choice for over 10 years. We have now been full-timers since 1997.

Idaho556 · RV-Dreams Family Member

As far hobbies I think she would get into something, she done a lot a different things, before she got in teaching kindergartner for the last 10 years, But when bring RV full time she always goes back to are kids what about them and celebrating the holidays, and birthdays, it not that she don’t like the rv camping, she just do know if she could do it full time.

Ckerr · RV-Dreams Family Member

Welcome to the forum. Since you've got some time before you could travel full time, the best thing I can suggest is to talk about it a lot! And as others have said, take some extended trips to see how the 2 of you do together. Pay attention to how you and she cope with the bad things that inevitably happen.

Kids are tricky. We actually think fulltime rving will free us up to spend a bit more quality time with Johnny's kids and grandkids in Louisiana as well as my family (I don't have kids myself, just brothers and their families in North Dakota, Minnesota and Washington.) I also figure we can go great places and the kids can visit us every now and then.

You might also share the online research process with your wife. Get her involved in this forum, reading blogs and check out the RV-Dreams Chatroom. Folks are there most evenings after 8pm central time. Let her ask questions and get to know some other folks living the lifestyle.

Mostly, I'd suggest looking for the compromise lifestyle that best meets the most of both your needs/dreams/desires.

RVRon · RV-Dreams Family Member

Welcome to the forum!

By all means give some serious thought to attending an RV-Dreams.com rally. We attended the one last month in TN and when we met all of the great people living our dream life we were sold on it for ourselves. The seminars will give you all of the things to consider when you're living the fulltime life so you'll feel comfortable. Howard and Linda are very complete with their info and anything they miss can be gleaned from the other attendees.

Don't worry about being a "newbie" at the seminar. When they took a count about a third were already fulltiming, a third already owned some kind of RV and the rest were attending to find out what it was all about.

Not sure where you live but if your "Idaho" name means anything you might be in luck. The 2011 RV-Dreams rallies are rumored to be held in the western portion of the US.

Texas TomT · RV-Dreams Family Member

Welcome to the Forum.
We became Full Timers as of yesterday, leaving our home in San Antonio, TX. We will be posting to our blog site to let everyone (family & friends) know where we are and what we are doing. I hope that you and the wife come to an agreeable accord on the FT'ing, when you are both ready for it. It took ME time to get to this point of acceptance-a leap of faith is a good term for it.
Again, Welcome to RV-Dreams...keep in touch.

Tom and Donna
270 FQS (modified to FTD) Terry Quantum
2007 Silverado VortecMax HD

Kendall · RV-Dreams Family Member

Welcome aboard Darwin:

I agree with Ron, get to a RVdreams rally ASAP. There is one coming up in Sept. in PA.

You won't have to talk her into anything once she does the Howard and Linda rally. They will answer all the questions she would have to ask you and you don't know the answers to.

The biggest problem you would have after a rally is picking out the rig you want.

I can promise you that she will have more fun then she has had in years. You will have a new family support system to feel a part of. Then you can't wait until the next rally that Howard and Linda are going to have. You might not need all that information again but we keep coming back for the fun times and new family members that we meet.

After the spring rally I went on to another rally and ran into five people that were at the spring rally. If I can make the PA rally in Sept. I will go again. Don't need the info but sure like to see everyone and have all that fun.

Good luck to you and the wife.

My motto is
RV there yet ?

Idaho556 · RV-Dreams Family Member

Thanks for all the the replys, I'am thinking I did this the wrong way and should just introduce myself and then started a new thread about my promblem in communty chat. sorry but again thank

Terry and Jo · RV-Dreams Family Member

Darwin,

Don't worry about it. Lots of folks include questions and issues with their introductory posts. In fact, by doing so, you give us an opportunity to "read between the lines" of your comments and questions so we can better answer your questions.

Good luck.

Terry