Goodbye... the dream dies - RV-Dreams Community Forum

Lucky Streak · RV-Dreams Community Member

Goodbye... the dream dies

Terry and Jo · RV-Dreams Family Member

Bill,

I know you said not to reply, but who knows. You may check back anyway.

I just wanted you to not lose heart entirely. I remember another forum member whose wife was originally completely against RV's almost entirely. They had one at one time, but when they would go camping, she tended to make derogatory remarks about the whole idea of RV's. With such negative feelings, he sold their camper.

Then, one day, she asked if they might rent one for an upcoming mission trip that they did every year. She didn't relish the idea of staying in a hotel room that was somewhat uncertain as to its cleanliness.

Last I heard, she is now occasionally suggesting places that they can go camping. Perhaps she isn't down yet for full-timing, but one never knows.

The whole point is that people do change their minds.

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

Terry

Melstar · RV-Dreams Family Member

I was against it at first...my hubby caught the desire first after staying 6 weeks with my daughter and family in their motorhome in California at the time!

Then I started on the research kick (something I love to do) and low and behold...the desire in me started to take hold.

My standard of RV was higher than Wayne's....but after looking at several....we compromised and God blessed us with one that is nice for camping, vacationing and maybe starting out fulltiming.

I felt sad when I read Bill's post......all the best to him and his wife.

-- Edited by Melstar on Saturday 1st of January 2011 01:33:35 PM

bubbadan · RV-Dreams Family Member

Hey Terry,
Bill it was me that Terry was talking about. Things do change and now we own a Jayco and planning a trip to Chicago, to visit our oldest daughter, and another trip to Colorado for a week, this does not include short trips to state parks. Last year we made our trip to Big Bend for our Mission trip and several trips to state parks here in Texas. My point is don't give up on the dream I didn't and things are getting better we even now have friends that have TT's, we are planning trips with them.

I am still wondering who this women is, she looks, talks and walks like my wife, I am just hoping my old wife doesn't show up again.

Keep the dream alive.
Dan

Ivey · RV-Dreams Family Member

My heart broke a little when I read your post. Keep the faith and try to find a compromise. Maybe full time is not in the cards for now but try little trips and who knows.

My thoughts are with you both and what ever you do I hope you are happy.

Racerguy · RV-Dreams Family Member

Looks like lucky streak hs removed himself from the forum altogether and is no longer active. cry

azrving · RV-Dreams Family Member

Bill,

You only get one ride, make the most of it. biggrin

Living Life Without Regret "Quotes"

"When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us."
--Alexander Graham Bell

"Don't let the past steal your present."
--Terri Guillemets

"Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future."
--Fulton Oursler

"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come."
--Joseph Campbell

"Get correct views of life, and learn to see the world in its true light. It will enable you to live pleasantly, to do good, and, when summoned away, to leave without regret."
--Robert E. Lee

If only. Those must be the two saddest words in the world."
--Mercedes Lackey

One's real life is often the life that one does not lead"
--Oscar Wilde

azrving · RV-Dreams Family Member

Racerguy wrote:

Looks like lucky streak hs removed himself from the forum altogether and is no longer active.

So sad!
He can still visit without signing up, maybe he will be back to check in on his final post. I am so happy that my wife and I, both are looking forward to the FT lifestyle.

-- Edited by azrving on Sunday 2nd of January 2011 05:44:01 PM

PD CFK · RV-Dreams Family Member

We are thinking of you Lucky Streak, hoping that you will find the good in the life that you are living now. Peace be with you. Pat and Charlie

Jake62 · RV-Dreams Family Member

After reading Bill's post, I had a "sit-down" with my DW to ensure this is simply just not my dream. Fortunately, and with great anticipation, she is looking forward just as much as I am to traveling to see our great country. I guess I really knew that already because we've talked about travel and have traveled in Motorhomes over the last 26 years of marriage. But it sure was reassuring to know we're still of like mind.

We're both not sure how long we'll stay on the road full-time without seeking potential refuge back in a S&B, but the nice thing is, we don't have to make that decision right now and will cross that road later, like many on this forum. Thru all the forums/posts I've read, traveling together with your best friend and loved one can be one of the most rewarding experiences of your life if you're on the same road with the same goals ... If not, it doesn't matter if you're in an RV or S&B, life will be much more challenging.

-- Edited by Jake62 on Monday 3rd of January 2011 08:11:57 AM

Jim01 · RV-Dreams Family Member

This thread brings up a great point. No matter how much you want to full-time, if your partner doesn't share the excitement and enthusiasm that you do, be sure that you are on the same page before you get too far into the planning stages.

If your partner is just going along with you because they think that full-timing is what you want to do and are not really enthused about the whole idea, ..... It probably won't work!!!!

In my opinion, both of you have to be totally committed to the idea. It's a big life changing step and should not be taken lightly.

Oh there will be times when you both question your sanity. I think everyone who makes a life changing move does, but if you're really committed, you'll end up in a great lifestyle.

Please, please, sit down with your partner and make sure that this is what you both want!!!! Talk about your fears, your doubts, and anything else that has to do with the change. If you have questions, Ask someone or do some research. The folks on this forum are great and most will help in any way they can.

Jim

Melstar · RV-Dreams Family Member

We talk about it almost every week! Both have reservations and excitements....but getting closer to being on the "same page".

rjenkins · RV-Dreams Family Member

My suggestion to Bill (I have a feeling he will go back to lurking) is that this does not have to be all or nothing for either party. Not knowing what was discussed, how about a compromise that can be affordable. As a couple, compromising is what makes things work in the long run.
How about instead of FT'ing, you PT. Who knows, it may grow on her. The advantage of PT'ing is that you do not need to have as elaborate an RV and/or tow vehicle than if you were FT'ing thus, less cost. Take your vacations in it. When you retire, start off with a one month trip, then maybe a two month, etc. In the meantime you keep your place of residence or downsize in order to do both.
Life is too short and takes too many twists and turns to say that the dream has died. It has only been put on hold or being re-evaluated to see how you can make it happen.
Good luck Bill and we all do hope to hear back from you.........

Gary · RV-Dreams Family Member

My DW and I are thinking the same PT route. She's not too up on living full time in the RV and wants a S&B. Spending time in the Navy, I can sleep on a 2x4 and need minimal space. Therefore, we have a compromise.

The compromise is that when the kids are through college, we sell the current S&B and find something smaller and have the ability to store an RV when we are at the S&B. Then, we leave in the winter and explore regions to the south and southwest, return for the spring time, depart again for points cooler during the summer then return for the fall. Looking at 3-4 months "inport", 3-4 months "deployed". She's determined that she can live with that.

Still in the planning phase though and it's good to know where each other stands. And the point of being able to get by with a less elaborate RV/TV is a selling point although I don't believe that to be a factor for us. The factor for us is having a "homeport" to return to.

Racerguy · RV-Dreams Family Member

We started out planning on 1 to 2 years full time then part time after that.After 8 months full time we have both agreed to move into part time as soon as we find a permanent spot.What has not been decided yet is if it will be a stix and brix or just a place to park the fiver permantly and finding a small motor home to travel in.Now this plan is written in jello and could change again once we leave Florida.Comunication is key.

2fortheroad · RV-Dreams Family Member

Racerguy wrote:

We started out planning on 1 to 2 years full time then part time after that.After 8 months full time we have both agreed to move into part time as soon as we find a permanent spot.What has not been decided yet is if it will be a stix and brix or just a place to park the fiver permantly and finding a small motor home to travel in.Now this plan is written in jello and could change again once we leave Florida.Comunication is key.

So George, what were some of the decideing factors too settle down again?

Ivey · RV-Dreams Family Member

We are thinking the same way as a lot of you. We are planning to full time for 2 or 3 years then settle somewhere. The agreement is we go as long as we want. When one wants to stop we stop. That might be 6 months down the road or 10 years, who knows. Speaking for myself I don't know for sure that I will like the full time lifestyle as much as I think I will, but I do know that if I don't try I will regret it for the rest of my life. I don't think we will ever totally quit but go to a part time travel as long as health allows.

We are storing a lot of our stuff then we hit the road to explore and find a place where we might want to settle again.

But George I am curious too. What made you decide to settle again so quickly?

Vicky

Racerguy · RV-Dreams Family Member

2fortheroad wrote:

So George, what were some of the decideing factors too settle down again?

That's harder to explain than you might think.We love traveling,seeing new places,meeting new people and everything about fulltiming.We really have no desire to ever have a lot of "stuff" again or a big home or yard to take care of.
It's more of a "it's time" feeling we both have and we have no regrets.We knew going in it wouldn't be a forever thing although there was a never set in stone timeline.We basically would like to spend summers in Oregon but are not sure where to spend winters yet as we are not very enamored with Florida so far.Still want to chase the sunshine but not travel so much.As I stated this is written in Jello and Linda and I have been known to change our minds several times before we pull the trigger on something.

-- Edited by Racerguy on Monday 3rd of January 2011 03:44:22 PM

-- Edited by Racerguy on Monday 3rd of January 2011 03:44:46 PM

Melstar · RV-Dreams Family Member

My DH and I are both "tied" to our belongings at this point. We are getting tired of the upkeep....and I've stopped buying "stuff".....we purchased a nice RV....could be used as a fulltime unit for a little while....but I would want something that opens wide on each side.

Wayne could have traveled in a 20 ft. "old" trailer.....I'm not up to that...I like my luxury. So we compromised....and I found a 4 year old 33' that meets my standards, at about l/3 the price of what I would buy if we went "fulltime". The truck is nice, but 8 years old. I love it though!

This met my desire for "luxury" and his desire to not spend a bundle....we are going out for our first "month" long trip in March.

We love our S&B and he loves his shop and I love my crystal, china, etc.....we will see in the next few years how much we want to keep it all.

kb0zke · RV-Dreams Family Member

As others have said, it is far better to have the discussions before the plans are set in stone. We're less than five years out from retirement, and during the past year the idea of FT somehow surfaced. Neither one of us remembers exactly how, or who, raised the idea, but we had both thought some about it. We are still discussing, and haven't committed to anything yet, but our direction is definitely towards at least a few years of FT travel.

We're using the same approach we took when we started homeschooling our children many years ago. The plan then was to continue only as long as we thought it was working. Since we are both teachers, we thought it would be easy to know when to quit. All three have now graduated from college, one is married, and we're still teaching them.

We're handling the traveling the same way. We bought a small TT that tows easily behind a current vehicle. Several short trips and one longer trip are already in the planning stages. If this works as well as we think it will, we'll give some serious thought to replacing the Mountaineer with a truck and the TT with a 5th wheel, or possibly going to a MH.

And, to comment on another thread, so far no one has called the men in the white coats!

rjenkins · RV-Dreams Family Member

Bill, my question is, why is the dream dead rather than still alive. This should not be a take it or leave it proposition with the spouse. So ok, FT'ing is not for her, then how about PT'ing then who knows, she might enjoy it so much she goes the next step. Also, I would think PT'ing would not require as an elaborate an RV and/or tow vehicle possibly allowing you to have a homestead as well.
Hope you are now just lurking, can't imagine anyone with these dreams to just quit cold turkey and you see some of the posts on here.
Personally, I have always thought the route I would take would be FT'ing with a place to go back to every now and then. I do not live big anyways, so a 1/1 S&B would be plenty in my situation, maybe the same thing would apply in your situation.
Good luck and please do come back and let us know what is happening.